WHY?

Why am I still feeling like this? It's already been 1 year, 10 months, 1 week and 6 days. But every time I see her I still have slight feelings. The ignorance is not helping either. And people constantly telling me to forget her and whatever bullshit about how she's not good enough is not helping at all. in fact I think it's making things worst for my emotions. I guess also that people can be real bitches. Screw it. Nice guys never win and in fact we come in last. All the time we spend trying to be a role model and whatever not crap just so we succeed in live and blah blah blah. I'm so sick and tired of it. In fact screw it to the max.

Someday I'll just rise above all of these. Its like half of me wants to forget her and the other half is holding on for dear life to her memories. Although they weren't much but i guess they mean more than the world to me. So what now? Haiz...

Yesterday was one of the shittiest days ever. Forget the fact about what happened earlier and how I ended up in JJ. But I saw her with a nother guy. Oddly the guy had to be my good friend's ex-bf. Hmmm..... Seems fishy to me. Anyways. It just felt so odd to be standing there watching them. I guess I made the right move by walking away.

Everyone keeps saying it's alright to feel this way or am I slowly losing my mind and my sanity?

BAck

Well holidays have been too awesome to spend on the computer.

School as usual is a pain in the arse. I got fatter during the holidays which just annoys me. School Form 4 now is so dam sakai liao. Very annoying. Anyways i shall not rant on and on about my school. It's just depressing. Anyways Pn.Maziah has started to hate me again. Lol. Very sarcastic of her always.

Before I end the post. APPARENTLY I'M JIA YUN' SOURCE OF ENTERTAINMENT. Lol.

LTC 09/10

LTC was freakin awesome. Enjoyed hanging out with the family(group). Very sporting and happening liao. Tat was so not my expectations. Haha.

The speaker, Martin Jalleh and Eric were really good. Very good motivators and extremely good psychologists. hahaha. No wonder I love psychology. Just from body language and the way people react u noe their personality.

Rooms were decent la. 4 people per room. Funny thing was tat 2 beds were extremely nice and soft and the other 2 felt like coffee tables. Literally could here a wooden sound when u step on it. Great roommates (Jia Heng, Eric Ewe and Lam Kar Wye). All of us always play cards and talk crap in the room. Hahahaha. Somehow Yinn's room ( Hannah loo, Thamil and XuE NiNg ) tersesat and got stuck in the middle of the guys block. So their room like stranded in the middle of all the boy rooms. Lol. But it was nice la. Can tok to them over the balcony at night.

GAmes were really huru-hara la. Cause we suspects got teams sabotage other teams. So have to change the game system a bit. But people say it was really nice. I had to be the Silver Toilet Bowl. =P Was fun being in front of people and they can't figure out who is the Silver Toilet Bowl.

As usual Mr. Karu was being Mr.Karu. Something like a dictatorship. But then again if anything happened to us, he would be in deep crap. So i can't really blame him for scolding some of the prefects. But I guess being teenagers they should also show us some face la. I shall just sit on the fence.

SMI Prefect Forever. =)

Youth Camp

Argh.... Youth Camp is so near and yet i cant confirm if i can go yet. This is saddening. I had so much planned for this camp. Nm i shall use it for next year's camp. Oh btw people. Pls do congratulate Sam. He finally recorded his first song although its in the BETA stage still. Hopefully I'll be back in time for camp. Or at least for the second night. i can be a special guest. Lol. Anyways i dun really have much to say now. I still gor paperwork to handle. So see ya till the holidays begin. =P God bless people.


P.S. Modern Warfare 2 is coming out. Woot!!!! =)

Prefect Farewell

Yesterday was a toatlly tiring day. unfortunately again I was too busy and not to mention lazy to bring along a camera so you guys gotta depend on others for photos or videos. Haha.

First in the morning at 7am i actually woke up earlier than both my parents without an alarm. haha. Went to salvation army to be a volunteer again after like 9 years. thank you to all who came to support the fair. You all noe the money is for the under priveledge orphans. Haha. At the end before i left at 1pm Uncle Dhee Leong fainted and is now hospitalised. Pls do pray for him. Anyways it was a toally fun morning besides the Uncle Chee Leong incident.

Then I went to school again for dance practice. It was fun hanging out with the guys doing stupid things and annoying Yinn Yinn. haha. Dance practice went great i guess. we managed to actually follow the songs beat and i learnt up my sketch. Lol. Kinda last minute i noe but still better the rest of the commisions =P. Went homne for 1 hour only to rest shower. =.= After tat went back to school for practice again before the farewell. Too hardworking adi they all. Lol. Felt so lazy to go for practice tat time. morning till then i only had 1 hour rest but thank God for the strength. The guys started playing basketball before the farewell started. My commision head seriously needs to eat more. he looks like a total African refugee. Lol. Not trying to be racist. Birthday bashed Noel (not real birthday) and Loo Hun Yee (real birthday) lol. Sujitra wanted play basketball with the guys. But after five minutes she left the macth. She din even touch the ball once. haha. Too bad Kah Chun wasn't there to save her. Lol.

We had games organised by HOMIES. Lol. Tarik tali was fun until i got a rope burn on my left arm after teammates let go of the rope. Haha. Then there was this game called Disaster. I find it totally racist tat at one point tat there was only one chinese in 'India'. Lol. Too bad the rain ruined the games. We had performance after dinner. Was so dam nervous. But everyone said we did great. Thank you Joel for all the support. haha. ISUC and HOMIES sang some songs. SAC had a dam funny dance. RJ and Jia Ee performed with the guitar.Terrence and Sarah oso performed. haha. It was so dam funny watching Er Vin and Yen Chiew dancing. haha. I laughed my butt off. Too bad We din get to see Dahien and Kartini, Kah Chun and Sujitra and Hong Wei and Thamil dance together. haha. I would have loved to see Dahien and Kartini dance together. Very secocok. haha. It was a great night. I love my sign for the performance. haha.

Manchester United VS Sundeland

Argh... Was watching the match last night. Lousy display on Man U's part. very lousy match. Ugh....
Man U DREW with Sunderland of all people!!!!! Zzzzz. 2-2. Some more the draw was a lucky one. First Darren Bent scored with a decent shot only. But I dun really think Ben Foster is a good keeper. He's too clumsy andnot too mention small. Lol. Then Berbatov scored with a nice bicycle kick in the second half. Haha. He finally scored. but soon Jones scored but he also body checked Ben Foster. And the ball just slowly bounced into the goal. Lol. Later in the game Richardson got sent off. Haha. Too bad for him. In the last few minutes of the game. There was a own goal by Anton Ferdinand. i was laughing my butt off at that goal. He really is the brother of Rio Ferdinand. All in all Sunderland should have won although I'm a Man U fan. But they should have won.

So Much For Holidays

Haiz my holidays have been so boring. Only been went fishing. Went out once to a cybercafe. An spent most of my holidays practicing dance in school for prefects farewell. Loads of time wasted there seeing that it takes so long for other people to learn up some simple steps. Ugh..... Exams are only 1 month away. need to start studying. But i just feel so lazy. Anyways I'm just ranting here cause I need to update my blog. Lol. Hopefully something interesting will happen after the exams or soon.